Planet Death (skit) Lyrics
[Skit: Enron’s Disciple, Quentin Thomas, William Kai, Enron Solstice]
Are you not entertained? I can smell their flesh from here. The Planet Death welcomes their souls
Remind me how the fuck we found ourselves armed to the teeth in a giant Roman Coliseum of the stars, about to go toe-to-toe with these psychopaths?
Look man, we just gotta stay alive!
And now, the supreme chancellor and ruler of Planet Death, the honorable Enron Solstice!
My people! The time is upon us to wash the blood from the souls of these sinners! Are you ready? We give these men to the gods above, to show allegiance. Now, let the blood drain from their bodies and run through our innocent!
[Skit (contd.) Quentin Thomas, William Kai, Roslyn, ATM]
Shit! How the hell are we supposed to kill these things? They look like giant scaly lions!
Oh shit, here. Take this TP3, aim for their hearts!
There’s a team to the North East!
Kai, there’s a sniper to your right
I know, I know, I know!
Take ’em out ATM!
I am sorry captain, but the Anti-Software won’t allow me to participate here, only biological
What good are you as a fuckin’ marine if you can’t help us kill the enemy? God damnit!
Uh-uh, fuck!
Kai’s been shot! He’s down!
Oh no, Kai’s dead!
Three approaching to your right, Captain
No! It can’t be, I can’t do this alone. I’ve never done this before
Captain, they are approaching
(What’s the point?)
Thomas, you need to move now
(It’s all over anyways)
You need to move now
(What’s the point?)
Thomas, no! Thomas, get up! Thomas, get up!
[Skit (contd.) Quentin Thomas, William Kai, ATM]
Game over, you’re dead. Game over, you’re dead
Goddamn! Why are you freezing like that?
‘Cause this game is impossible. How could I have even slightly damaged their mage when my space barbarian isn’t even level 43?
You just needed to use juggernaut, then shoot the fuck out of those ho’s with your GP3, on the full auto, man
Look, I tried to play this game and I don’t know man, these neural path games just don’t do it for me. Now chess- that is a game I can play!
Man, you just old
Fuck you! Chess is amazing. Why even play shit like this?
Honestly?
Yeah
As an escape!
Escape from what?
The day to day, I guess. It’s the same reason I lose myself in film and music. It feels like home
You know what? I may not get that game, but I get that